A new book examines research on how to succeed after religiously ‘doing’ | The Anabaptist world

Americans are leaving organized religion in staggering numbers. In the recently released book Done: How to Succeed After ApostasyHope College psychology professor Daryl Van Tongeren offers ways to navigate the “sadness, loss, pain and longing” that often accompanies such changes and then points to new ways to find meaning.

His book goes beyond anecdotes and memoir to provide information based on his research – which focuses on social motivation for meaning and its relationship to virtue and behavior – as director of the Frost Center for Social Science Research at Hope College in Holland, Michigan.

For readers looking for more, Van Tongeren is working on another book with his wife, Sara Showalter Van Tongeren, a clinical social worker who specializes in conversions. Their forthcoming book is intended to help counselors and therapists, who may not have a religious background themselves, understand how important religion is to many people and why it should be left behind. often to the detriment of their health.

RNS spoke with Daryl Van Tongeren about why people leave religion and what they turn to for fulfillment. This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

What inspired you to write? It’s finished?

For a long time, I have been researching how religion helps people find meaning in life. I noticed the trend of people turning away from religion, and the rise of “those who don’t have it.” Everyone was still treating non-religious people as this same group of people, as if there were religious and non-religious people. It seemed strange that they never thought about the history of human religion. If someone had been a believer at one time, he would not be like the other “non-religious”. Another question was: As the number of non-religious people and people who leave religion increases, what are the psychological consequences of leaving religion?

To It’s finishedyou talk about the four main reasons people leave the faith. You call them “the four horsemen of the religious apocalypse.” What is it?

The four horsemen are, we’re learning from the data, the four main reasons why people leave religion. The first is cultural collapse. People are becoming more progressive. Their beliefs and attitudes change, but religious institutions remain. People say, “I left for mental reasons, or I just left my faith.” Or there may be more obvious differences in values, such as, “My church is not LGBTQ+ affirming or supportive of women in ministry or engaging in racism.”

The second is religious stress, such as when a person is harassed or distressed by religion by religious institutions or religious leaders, either through their own eyes, they see it happening to someone they know or it is happening at the center.

Third, people have what they see as a simplistic view of suffering. People encounter problems or suffering, and they say that they do not understand that misfortune or suffering according to what they have been taught about God or their religious beliefs.

The fourth is a problematic label, so people no longer want to be known as “religious,” or in the United States, in other places, as “evangelicals,” since those words have become associated with certain values ​​or those meanings. people may not want to associate with them. This was especially true after 2016 when 81% of white evangelicals voted for Donald Trump, and a poll a few years ago found, and I think I should have said this, that 30% of evangelicals who do not believe in God. Jesus Christ, which should be the unifying theme of what it means to be an evangelist. So the word has taken on some kind of social political significance that is very different from its original religious meaning.

Do you find that people are leaving other American religious congregations in similar numbers?

Social trends suggest that all religions are declining, but Christianity is losing the highest number (of people). It may be partly because it was the main religion in the US, so there are a lot of people to go. But it can also be something about the way evangelical Christianity is actually shown. Many of the values ​​and beliefs and practices supported by evangelical Christianity are being questioned in many different ways. They include critical views on science, sex, gender and marriage. People say that those values ​​are no longer compatible with my beliefs. I need to find something I can believe in and keep true to.

Is there a way to leave religion? If so, what does it look like?

The process begins with what many people call deconstruction, people questioning what they believe and fighting what they think. As if everything is worthy of criticism and questioning. During this period of dissolution, people dissolve all or most of their beliefs. Then there is a way in which they renew their beliefs.

Some people still live in religion. Those people restore. They remain firmly within a religious tradition or religious tradition. They may still present themselves as people of faith, but their faith looks very different.

Some convert directly outside of religion. They distinguish themselves. Thus, people may no longer believe in God, mainstream theology or any supernatural agents at all. They can change their emotional relationship with God and no longer feel connected or close to the supernatural (divine or God). They may stop obeying religious ethics, finding a way that is more in line with how they feel they should live in the world. They may also isolate themselves from their religious communities.

In the book you talk about the issue of “remnants of religion” and religion is powerful, sometimes unconscious it can have, even in people who believe they have left it. Can you talk more about that?

The way people think, feel and behave continues to be the same as the way they thought, felt and behaved when they were religious, even after they don’t call themselves religious. We see this in many different areas including their views on God or their views on other religious people and religion in general. We see this, you know, the number of times they participate in religious services. Is this good? Is this bad? I consider it descriptive.

We know that religion is associated with being pro-social. We found that after leaving religion, people still give more money and are more willing to volunteer than people who have never been religious. We also conducted recent research that found that people’s negative religious beliefs may also be perpetuated. For example, people continue to believe in hell and the devil much more after they leave religion than people who have never been religious – even if they consider themselves to be atheists. there.

Letting go of religion takes time. I hope to get used to it. I want people to be aware of these remnants, so that they can look for them in parts of their lives, and then make decisions that are consistent with their values, instead of just reacting from the remnants of religion. I want people to be able to make values-based choices that allow them to create their true identity. If they realize that there are remnants of religion, they may have to be more careful and ask themselves, am I doing this because of something I really want, or is this a remnant? the back of the religious past?

So how do people learn to be successful after they leave religion?

We have another proof that life loses some meaning after leaving religion. Religious people report the highest meaning, and religious “actions” equal religious “nothings.” There are real costs to travel.

Often, people invest in new sources of meaning. Relationships have always been a great source of meaning, so it is possible for people to pour into them, but that can be difficult, if their family or friends do not support them. They may also seek a non-religious spiritual connection, such as nature or an appreciation of the universe (awe, wonder, curiosity). But perhaps one of the more challenging aspects of this transition is to assemble a new worldview that makes sense, is coherent, and matches their life experiences. That can take time to accumulate. Sometimes people flock to politics as a new idea; for others, they may be “near-religious experiences” that have a religious look and feel without religious content.

It’s a slow process, but with time and focus, people can experience growth and success.